General TalksHumor / JokesQuestions you just can't answer.....

04 Nov 2009, 11:29

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

What is the speed of darkness?

Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours?

Are there specially reserved parking spaces for 'normal' people at the Special Olympics?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?


Did you ever stop and wonder......

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze
these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?'

Who was the first person to say, 'See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum.'

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs !

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Stop singing and read on.........

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first place?

Rating 8 Comments 9
everzcool4
0
everzcool4 04 Nov 2009, 11:46 #
Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Stop singing and read on.........
you got me (8

+ for ya
bhanvra
0
bhanvra 04 Nov 2009, 12:15 #
amazing list...from where did you got it?? ;p :m
alexanderthe
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alexanderthe 05 Nov 2009, 13:18 #
Haha i remember the kamikaze thing it was for communication =P
PeacefulReality
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PeacefulReality 09 Nov 2009, 02:58 #
Why do you drive on a parkway, and park on a driveway?

I've seen many of these before, I still laugh when I read them though xD
vijender
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vijender 13 Nov 2009, 10:32 #
If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?


I am definitely going to sort it out.
howcanitellyouanything
1
howcanitellyouanything 17 Nov 2009, 06:42 #
Why is Mr. Right's first name Always?

The difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is in the taste.

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia: Fear of long words.

The more you run over a cat, the flatter it gets.

Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids"?

Deja Vu - When you think you're doing something you've done before, it's because God thought it was so funny, he had to rewind it for his friends

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just dont have film.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

How come we choose from just two people for president and fifty for Miss America?

Why is the man who invests all of your money called a "broker?"

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter?

Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injection?

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Why do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke?

Why do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage?

Why do banks leave the main doors open and then chain the pens to the counters?

Why do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering?

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is it homeless or naked?

I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he's gone
snhkicker
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snhkicker 02 Dec 2009, 21:51 #
nice ones keep up the good work
rpyleoh
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rpyleoh 21 Apr 2010, 13:59 #
to figure out:If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

you would have to figure out if it was in celcius or farenhight and then convert it to the opposite and put it for example for positive number:X-2

for negative numvber:x2

thats how u figure it out. :)

i just pay attention in science class...
Siab
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Siab 06 May 2010, 13:40 #
Good one smartie pants rpyleoh, i reckon there are awnsers for all of these,
i could say but i think it would take a lot of fun out of it. well i think a good answer for .... i was thinking but i think my mind is broke. any ideas, for cartoons that i could watch. i think i will make a post
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mrbooombastic
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